Thursday, April 14, 2005

Howl...

This whole post is one big, fat, hairy TMI. Consider yourself warned!!!
My sister and I have been cursed with lycanthropic issues. It's something that affects just the two of us; no one else in the family. We don't know who we inherited this gift from. We've been polling all the women in the family about their frequency of shaving. The usual reply is "Two or three weeks or whenever needed. I have light baby hair on my legs anyway." Grrr. Many family members, both male and female have no leg hair at all! For Kate and me, especially in the summer, we sometimes need to shave twice a day. Nasty.

And then there's the moustache issue.
Example
I purchased this stuff a few months ago and haven't had much luck. It's only supposed to take about three minutes to dissolve all the upper-lip fuzz. Well, after five minutes all the fuzz is still there. And so is the lingering Nair stink. I'm worried to leave it on any longer, for fear of becoming what Kate refers to as "Captain Red Lip" (her secret identity which she assumed a few Christmas Eves ago. Yow, that was a seriously funny burn!) I'm leery about getting a lip wax this afternoon after my failed chemical attempt of this morning, but I don't want to have any serious facial shortcomings for Saturday.

Another issue I have with this Nair stuff is the fact that all the instructions were on the cardboard package, NOT on the actual tube. I threw out the packaging after I bought it. The back of the tube is dedicated to advising users to try a test patch prior to usage, and warnings such as "Do not use on breast nipples." As opposed to the other kind???

At least I don't have the eyebrow issue...sorry Kate.

15 comments:

Egan said...

I am stalking your circle of friends. So I felt I must comment on your blog.

I do have a monobrow, so maybe I should give this Nare stuff a whirl.

ago-go said...

jen -i totally understand the 2 x day shaving stuff. as a dark-haired chick, i tend to avoid shorts for that very reason. waxing might be the way to go but you don't want to be all raw for your date!

egan -tweezers are probably your best bet for a unibrow...let your wife loose, she's probably been dying to get her hands on the mono anyway.

Jen said...

Egan--Ago is right. Plucking or waxing is best for the brow. You'd probably be blinded by the fumes!

Ago--dark haired chicks unite! Unfortunately, thanks to the too-good-to-pass-up shorts sale at Old Navy, I'll be showing off my legs in all their splendor this summer. The fact that I'm albino-pale jut amplifies the hair thing. I guess it's time to try that MysticTan.

Vavoom said...

I live perpetually with facial hair. No matter how much I shave, I've still got a 5 o'clock shadow. Maybe electrolysis will help? Ouch.

Egan said...

Yes, my wife loves to pick at my body. It's a strange thing. It seems women are either all about this or they aren't. I did an informal poll on my blog about this behavior and some readers were completely disgusted and others were in complete agreement. I think those in the disgusted camp just can't deal with the word zit.

Egan said...

By the way, tweezers do work much better than Nare. (censoring myself now) Carry on.

ago-go said...

i am a chronic boyfriend groomer. so sue me. it's waaaaay too much fun to make someone pretty.

Egan said...

I know. I spend at least 20 minutes in the morning in front of the mirror primping. I have to apply foundation, use that scary contraption to curl my eyelashes, pluck a few hairs, kiss a square piece of toilet paper, and smile. It's all in a day's work.

Jen said...

Egan--I bet you're a real looker in drag! Don't forget to exfoliate and moisturize!

Egan said...

Um yeah... my mom did make me dress as a girl every other Halloween. I think she just wanted another girl.

Hoagie1 said...

I feel sorry for you.

Yet I ahppy that you are doing something about it. Mustache on woman just does not look right.

Actaully all hair that are not on top of the head are gross.

Seriously ladies start shaving or waxing.

Anonymous said...

Nair, the facial kind. You leave it on for 10 minutes and voila! Trust me. I have thee most sensitive skin EVER! I have to watch any and everything I put on my body because I'm easily irritated. You can find it at Wal-Mart!

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