Friday, October 29, 2004

Detroit part II

Thanks to this movie being filmed downtown, the turds in charge of road construction have screwed with everyone trying to park, drive or work in this part of the city. The city has decided to focus on the construction project taking place on Larned, and in doing so, has blocked a bunch of the entrances to the garage. Maybe if they hadn't broken the watermains and gas lines during the past several months of construction, things would be on schedule???

And if that weren't enough, John Kerry is making a campaign stop at Hart Plaza on Monday. Where the hell will everyone park?????

Wednesday, October 27, 2004

Detroit is the place to be!

We were just given a press release from the location manager of the flick-in-the-making titled "The Island" starring Ewan McGreggor and Scarlett Johansen. For reasons that personally escape me, they have decided to shoot some scenes right outside my building on November 1st. Um, yeah. A futuristic horror drama shot on a corner occupied by art deco-style buildings? This means that from 7 am to 7 pm, no cars will be allowed to enter or exit the building's parking garage. And traffic will be a bitch x 1000. And people dressed in garb ala 2044 will be milling about. I guess the movie is about some kind of organ harvesting experimental project (sounds like "Parts: The Clonus Horror" btw--Great MST3K Episode.) I wonder what the 2044 fashions will be like?

And if that weren't enough, one of my co-workers swears she saw Jude Law at the IHOP on Jefferson. Or a good looking guy with a British accent and good manners and a confident attitude who was speaking to someone overseas on his cell (she's a bit nosy.) Anyway, she's positive it's him. Since I'm the "girl in the know"--her exact phrase, she had me find out if he was in town (God knows why) and I couldn't locate anything. Maybe the pigs in a blanket are an international draw? If it's a slow news day, I'm sure it will be reported.

Monday, October 25, 2004


I participated in the Detroit Marathon 5K and now I am SORE! As I was laying around my office feeling sorry for myself, I eavesdropped on a conversation between two attorneys, one of whom ran the whole 26.? miles (his first marathon) and survived, and seems to be walking without any obvious difficulty. Damn, I'm a sorry-ass wimp! My 5K performance sucked thanks to asthma, the legs weren't too bad but the lungs completely pooped out after 1 stinking mile! I think I finished in 42 minutes! Lame!

My soreness can be attributed to the post-race massage I was given by the massage-therapy students set up at Ford Field. The girl who did my deep-tissue massage went a bit too deep in the muscle and I'm actually bruised. Again, insert the sorry-ass wimp comment here!

Mark my word--I will run the Detroit Marathon this time next year...and I will finish it!!!

Friday, October 22, 2004

I'll take "Awesome Jobs" for $1000, Alex...

As a former contestant on Jeopardy, I was just emailed and notified of several awesome opportunities for employment! This is strange! It's like everything is starting to fall into place! Maybe, one day, I can be a researcher and proofreader and actually doing something that I am qualified to do! This is what I've been waiting for forever! This kind of job. A job where I can be the world's biggest geek, and being that way would be encouraged! My brain can finally function in the manner in which it deserves!

Okay, resume workshop at my house this weekend!

Wednesday, October 20, 2004


A co-worker saw me in the coffee room at work this morning and said "Hey sexy librarian!" I just can't take a compliment. I had to go on a tangent regarding the earned title of librarian and how one must have the Master's degree completed in order to ethically assume the title, much like calling oneself a doctor or lawyer...then I said, "Thanks for the compliment anyway." Everyone at work knows I'm a nut, but a basically harmless one. And I am wearing a short black skirt, heels, eye makeup and my hair is blonder than usual, so hey, maybe I am "sexy." Damn that was difficult to type!

Finally! A practical hobby...

I'm learning how to knit this afternoon!!! A group of secretaries (and non-secretarial me) have started a knitting group at work, and luckily I'm not the only complete beginner! I've been planning on learning for years, and I've had a few unsuccessful attempts involving how-to books with grade-school level instructions and supposedly easy-to-follow directions. Ha! Not so easy for everyone!

So here I am, in my little office with a ridiculous amount of yarn under my desk. And I somehow have acquired more kntting needles than most veteran knitters. I'll be happy to make a scarf for Kate's birthday.

Monday, October 18, 2004

File under "S" for Spinster

I just finished watching "Two Week's Notice" with Sandra Bullock and Hugh Grant. I need to disprove the myth once and for all: the smart, mousy girl never gets the cute, rich, successful guy. Whoever is spreading this crock of shit fantasy to all the plain girls must be stopped. And however hard one searches, sometimes there is not a pretty girl hiding under the glasses, braces and freckles.

Thursday, October 14, 2004

Sick and tired...

I'm fighting diligently everyday but I can detect something big and nasty on the horizon. Something bigger than my puny immune system, something stronger than a dose of NyQuil, something thicker and more viscous than last year's bloody phlegm-a-thon. I'm slowly and surely getting sick and there's nothing I can do about it! Damn! And thanks to this flu shot shortage bullshit, I have decided to go sans-vaccination for the first year in a decade or so. Oh well, maybe a day spent at home in bed with a nice bowl of soup will do me some good.

Now onto tired. At the end of this month, I will be going on a sabbatical. I need a break from the hillbillies who wink at me and email me. I'm fairly specific on what I'm looking for in a fella: 27-32, at least a bachelor's degree, no children, impeccable grammar, no obivious interest in NASCAR or wrestling. I seem to be a magnet for every single guy in a 30 mile radius who doesn't fall into ANY of these catergories. And let me tell ya, there's very little in this world worse than opening an email and seeing a short, fat, bald (yet hairy in all the wrong places) 40-something guy posed "seductively" in a wife-beater carnie undershirt. Yick. So, unless a miracle occurs, I'll be taking a break from the online social life.

Wednesday, October 13, 2004


I've been bummed for a while now and things need to change. I'm going to start actively looking for things that make me happy and here are a few:

I just saw a preview for "The Life Aquatic with Steve Zissou"--the new Wes Anderson flick, and it looks totally, ridiculously awesome! It wil be released around Christmas.

I had a spiritual experience yesterday that made me question my career choices and life's purpose, yet again. I took the People Mover to the newly re-opened Downtown branch of the Detroit Public Library and from the moment I stepped over the threshold, I was awestruck. Seriously, I just had to stand back and look. It was amazing, just what a library was meant to be, and just what a Carnegie library should be. It was perfect! My heart was racing as I looked around the clean, crisp, marble floored building, climbed the curving staircase, looked at some exhibits (don't remember what they were) and settled down in the fiction reading room. This is seriously the over-romanticised idea of what my perfect library would be. And the library I would like to be a librarian at. I have about two years left to complete my MLIS, maybe I should think about doing that yet again.

Monday, October 11, 2004

It's a "Rainy Days and Mondays" kinda thang...

Yep, this is me (sans abs and loose boob, of course.)

Take the quiz: "Which'>">"Which beautiful Sorceress are you?"

Lightening Sorceress
You depict the Lightening Sorceress! Controlling lightening and using it for weaponry is your main magic. The rain is your sanctuary and the thunder is your guide.

Friday, October 08, 2004


It's days like today when I start to get really introspective and try to figure out what the hell I'm doing with my life. Although I'm 27 years old, I still occasionally say "When I grow up I'm going to..." then I catch myself and feel dumb. Yes, I know you're only as old as you feel, but since I have arthritis in my elbows, hips and left hand fingers, I'm feeling about 85. I still look really young and I'm carded all the time, but pretty soon I'm going to become just a lady instead of "young lady." Crain's Detroit Business has a yearly "40 Under 40" article, but I'm going to be forty in thirteen years. There's no way in hell I'm planning on getting into Crain's, especially since I don't care about business or starting a company.

I'm thinking about starting a music career...okay a music hobby to piss off my family and friends. Leonard Cohen was pushing 40 before he ever appeared on stage...but he was also a semi-well known poet, author and songwriter before the world knew him as a performer. I have one song mostly written: "We both know I'm better off alone." Isn't that a great title? I have other ideas about songs but they mostly revolve around things that are pissing me off at the time, like my desk chair and winter itch ("The hairy legs exzema itchiness blues.") If I had a wonderful voice things could work out, but I don't. I'm a second alto, and a fairly nasal one at that. Maybe if I wasn't perpetually stuffed up and bothered with sinus problems and other ear, nose and throat problems I would sound better. Leonard Cohen has the best voice, and like a fine wine, it's getting better with age. I could probably remember what I learned in guitar lessons from six years ago. Maybe I'll acquire a child's learning guitar for my child-size hands.

It's been an especially bad ADD day. I really haven't been able to accomplish any of my tasks for the day and I've been going mad! I even called around to try and find a psychiatrist who will prescribe Ritalin for me. I'm not too keen on how it seems to turn on and suddenly turn off, but it does work for nice, three hour long stretches. Another option is Adderal, but that shit is way addictive and I could see myself getting really screwed up on it. It took years to fight that addiction, and I still get cravings every time I thing about it...but the damn stuff worked so incredibly well!!!

People like me were never meant to have steady, 40 hour a week jobs. I'm sure my brain and flaky personality will get me fired and I'll never have a decent reference, and I'll be living with my parents ad infinitum! Yeah, like I need another situation like the one I'm in! I need to find employment at an art gallery, or at Borders, or somewhere where I can get the creative juices flowing. I'm an artist at heart. At the rate I'm going I'll be in a group home painting Grandma Moses-type folk art, after the lobotomy, of course.

Thursday, October 07, 2004

Onychophagia and Onychotillomania

Yeah, at times I have the nasty habit of biting my fingernails and cuticles down to the nubs and now my fingers hurt like hell! Even typing is painful. And it's not even a good kind of pain. I can go for months at a time without biting, grow long and gorgeous, albeit bendy nails, but then something will happen and *BOOM* two seconds later-- bloody carcass stumps. Now my fingers look like those of ET when he and Elliot were getting sickly, right before the government bastards invaded the house in clean suits. Gray, scaly and nasty-pale--yeah, I guess the anemia doesn't help matters, aesthetically speaking.

Tuesday, October 05, 2004

Do you like American music?

I like American music best, baby! I've been thinking about my freshman year at college recently and remember several road trips involving the Violent Femmes. Now I'm listening to everything from them that I can find and I'm loving it. And if you should happen to see me singing along in my car-- big deal! I can't sing but I'm enjoying myself. I even discovered Yahoo's Launch--a cool site with zillions of videos available. I saw the vid. for "American Music" and it was bleepin' awesome!!! I didn't know they made one. I can recall a VF video on MTV's 120 Minutes maybe a decade ago, but this blast from the past was way long overdue. I was surprised to find a video for "Children of the Revolution"--better than the T-Rex version, if you ask me, and I'm very familiar with both.

Saturday, October 02, 2004


Shaun of the Dead ROCKS!!! And now I have "Panic" fromThe Smiths stuck in my head.

Friday, October 01, 2004

One More Thing...

Happy October!! I'm decorating the house for Halloween this weekend! (Just the inside and just with pumpkins.)

100 Things all about me (11-23)

11. My eyes are very green; NOT hazel.
12. I was once dumped for Star Wars! (although I'm sure there were more factors involved on his end, this is all I know for sure.)
13. I am double jointed.
14. I rescued/adopted an Eastern Box Turtle named John. His previous, not-very-nice family called him "Longneck."
15. I have the nasty habit of biting my fingernails down to the nubs.
16. I was a huge "Twin Peaks" fan and love anything David Lynch does.
17. When I'm in shape, I'm a pretty good distance runner.
18. I have been experiencing an intense craving for Olga's Original Lamb for a few years. It won't go away.
19. I prefer British comedies to most American TV shows.
20. I have studied piano, flute and guitar. I taught myself clarinet.
21. Through research and trial, I discovered that the two most deadly songs in the world are "Brand New Key (I've got a brand new pair of rollerskates)" by Melanie and "Funky Town." "The Pina Colada Song (Escape)" is a close third. Try functioning with any of these stuck in your head.
22. I've seen They Might Be Giants in concert three times.
23. I love the cartoon "Kim Possible."

That's all for now!