Wednesday, June 08, 2005

Scalded...

I just returned from running errands and checking on something at Wayne State. On the way home, I stopped at Trader Joe's for flax seed chips for my sister (more on her later, tomorrow maybe) and all-natural peanut butter. Anyway, I'm pushing the shopping cart with my right hand, the left is awkwardly holding a free sample cup of coffee, and I notice a very attractive young fella in the frozen organic section (tall, skinny, pale, dark-haired, glasses, no wedding ring, vaguely Jewish looking...just my type.) So, like a moron, I move my cart near his, pretend to be interested in the veggie enchiladas, prepare to make eye-contact and manage to spill the blisteringly hot coffee on my skirt and flip flop-clad feet. If that weren't enough, I also sounded like I had Tourette's syndrome. A very colorful string of expletives left my mouth and I think he ran away. Dammit. I just can't win.

Reading: Moby Dick

Drinking: Crappy strawberry wine--a wedding favor I found in the pantry.

Hearing: The Dead Milkmen

Wearing: Black Kenneth Cole sleeveless blouse, black skirt w/white polka dots and black beaded flip flops

4 comments:

yournamehere said...

Alright, the Dead Milkmen. The only time I ever did Karaoke I sang "Punk Rock Girl." I was a little tipsy, but I did a damn good impersonation of the whiny vocals. People who knew the song liked it. People who didn't told me I can't sing.

ago-go said...

you mean that you're wearing a black skirt with white polka dots with coffee stains on them! you so need to buy those sassy heels now, you'd be in polka dot heaven (or hell).

i wish i was drinking crappy strawberry wine, you're giving me the urge to raid the liquor cabinet...probably not the best idea since i'm taking sleeping pills.

jennifer said...

Ynh: Everyone sounds good singing "Punk Rock Girl." I was belting it out today loud and proud in my car. I'm afraid my only karaoke experiences have involved "I Will Survive" and Tom Petty's "American Girl."

Ago: Yes, I forgot to mention the coffee stain accessory. Maybe I'll buy those shoes with my next unemployment check. I drank an entire bottle (small bottle) of that wine and nothing. Not even a tiny buzz...which is good because I'll probably be sleeping with Prince Valium tonight.

egan said...

Just you and me and Punk Rock Girl.

This is a lovely story. I did this same kind of crap when I was single. I would slyly glance at hot girl and think no one had any idea until I dropped my keys and made eye contact. I would flash a smile and then she would run the other way. Thanks for sharing.