Thursday, September 30, 2004

Blah...

It's an okay day so far. After waking up at 5:00, eating a balanced breakfast, showering, dressing, looking presentable, making a lunch and managing to get to work at 7:45, everything is going fine so far. But I'm still functioning at 37% I'm feeling really anxious, but that could be attributed to the extra cup of coffee this morning, but probably not. I'm having bad dreams about school already, so I'll do nothing but study all weekend. My mom and dad are driving to WV to see Kate on Saturday, so the whole house will be mine. I'm having a house party! With Bird and Turtle. I'm sure the turtle could do a better keg stand than me.

Against the wishes of some people, I did not ask out my crush. After years of opportunities, I took the safe route. Maybe it's for the best...I know it's not, but I'll keep telling myself this. It's been such a long time since I was happy in another person's presence. I'm not sure I've ever been completely happy when dating any of the (very few) guys from my past. After a couple of months (or weeks) I would find myself mentally trying to burn a hole in the back of their heads. This is kinda sick but absolutely true; I was trying to harness my psychic powers to do evil. That's not a sign of a healthy relationship. I can't remember doing that to Luis, but he treated me like shit from the beginning and I was basically a doormat.

Okay, enough. I need to get back to work.

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